Tuesday, April 19, 2005

cirkle jerk over!

i reckon a feller name "bent dick 16" (ol boy must have a whoper!) is the new pope. what i here tell after hes last to get his gun off them fellers smokt sum pot an blowd the smok up a fukin chimley! dam they shore is strang folks.

Friday, April 15, 2005


whut a wunerful feller!

Thursday, April 14, 2005

sumpin sumbodie sent

i gots this frum sumbodie, i thot it wuz funny.

Ted Kennedy Fights Removal of Feeding Tube

WASHINGTON, DC --- Ted Kennedy, who was recently declared brain-dead by his physician, is fighting for his life. The Senator's family is trying to have his feeding tube removed to allow him to die a sober death. The tube, attached to a bottle of vodka and a bottle of gin, has been utilized by the senator for his entire adult life. Medical experts believe removal will almost certainly result in death.

"This is a very complex situation," said one medical expert. "Senator Kennedy appears to be functioning normally to many people, but it is quite obvious that the man is brain-dead by his public comments. Most of us in the medical community think he should be allowed to have a dignified death by sobering him up and removing his feeding tube."

Liberals were stuck in a quandary today as they want Terri Schiavo dead, but they don't want Ted Kennedy to die. "This is a moral dilemma to many people," said Commie Greenstein, a liberal living in New York. "Fortunately, most of us don't really make decisions based on any morals, so it's okay if we want one person to die while allowing a brain-dead person to live."

Alcohol manufacturers around the world are scrambling to raise money for the "Keep Kennedy Alive" fund. Removing his feeding tube is predicted to cause a 12% annual decrease in global alcohol consumption. Some manufacturers risk going out of business as soon as the feeding tube is removed.

Monday, April 11, 2005

findin a pope

them kathlic fellers shore has a werd way of getin a new pope, cordin to uncle ned. he sez they gets in a big cirkle an everbodie grabs the wun on the rite an starts apumpin. last wun what gets his gun off is the new mainest man. no wunder it a big sekret huh?

Hay i'll be on tv over to uncle neds in a bit. gotta member to pull off em plow shoes this time cause he shore gits pissed when i gets cow dropins on toppa his tube!

Saturday, April 09, 2005

gotta have em!

kaint live nother day withoutem! an i beat the instypuntrib to postin em, jes lak i sed i would cuple weeks ago! nuther wuna my perdiktions what cum true.

Sunday, April 03, 2005

hay i kin do it two!

lak at instepundrip feller what links to amerzon all the time, ima goner link to mine! git yorself wonnaese thang!

i heared'at sum feller name pope diet. wunder ifn it wuz ol bob pope frum dog ball lick? he shore looked mitey bad last time i seen him.